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	<title>Splenetical.com</title>
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	<description>indoctrinate . expunge . rinse . repeat</description>
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		<title>Pedicures: Fuckin&#8217; Disgraceful</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Pedicure. A word suggesting electro-shock therapy for fiddlers. And obscuring a reality that is far more repellent than all the child abuse in the world combined. Every day on my way home from work I pass a pedicure salon which, without fail, is straining to its very foundations beneath some fat fucking asshole reclining like [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/real-life/pedicures-fuckin-disgraceful/</link>
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		<title>I survived the Christchurch Quake and all I have left is this shitty blog</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Well Christchurch is totally fucked. But I&#8217;m alive, and so is my all my family. And I&#8217;m doing what any reasonable New Zealander would do at a time like this. I&#8217;m moving. Melbourne awaits, it&#8217;s legs metaphorically open to me. And I can rest easy knowing I&#8217;m heading to a land flowing with milk and [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/real-life/i-survived-the-christchurch-quake-and-all-i-have-left-is-this-shitty-blog/</link>
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		<title>How to spot a pedophile: The Pedophile Ring</title>
		<description><![CDATA[There is now a way besides the Pedo-smile to identify a pedophile completely scientifically: Just look for the tell-tale pedophile ring. Now you might ask, &#8216;what is creepier, the pedophile or the guy (me) taking a photo(s) of the pedophile on the bus?&#8217; And I answer, &#8216;the pedophile, no question &#8211; I mean did you [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/real-life/how-to-spot-a-pedophile-the-pedophile-ring/</link>
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		<title>Betray it Forward</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I have 2 days  left in my 6-month contract and I have selected my no.1 Office Life Pet Peeve. To merely call it a pet peeve doesn&#8217;t do justice to how much this really annoys me. May I present, Betray it Forward, otherwise known as the Email Forward Betrayal. This is when A (me) emails [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/office-life/betray-it-forward/</link>
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		<title>In the market for a new wang?</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Make no mistake, this is not another hilarious case of &#8216;Engrish&#8217; or yet another hilarious &#8216;Fail&#8217; (tho it is an Epic Wang!). It is quite intentional. I went inside and it was wall-to-wall wangs of every size and colour. It&#8217;s the Willy Wonka&#8217;s Chocolate Factory of wang supermarkets. Afterwards I had a lovely break from [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/real-life/in-the-market-for-a-new-wang/</link>
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		<title>The Kaikoura Chainsaw Massacre</title>
		<description><![CDATA[By way of introduction, simply: fuck Kaikoura. Just when you thought it was safe to drive from Christchurch to Picton to catch the Interislander, it turns out you will need to pass through New Zealand&#8217;s most demented town, bursting at the seams with violent predatory retards. Kaikoura, the town healthy genetics forgot, where &#8211; this [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/news/the-kaikoura-chainsaw-massacre/</link>
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		<title>Readership Review 2010 &#8211; You sick fucks</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;ve just reviewed keywords for 2010 for the traffic that arrived at my site (i.e. what people typed into google to find brainwashable.com). Again, this confirms my belief that the only hope for our species is a catastrophic flood to engulf the planet destroying all life except for George Clooney and a hot nun who [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/readership/readership-review-2010-you-sick-fucks/</link>
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		<title>Sheer joy as Assange cut loose</title>
		<description><![CDATA[In continuing my obsession with celebrity resemblences, and in light of Assange&#8217;s new spiky white frosting, I am delighted to bring you: OMG, Julian Assange looks just like Rutger Hauer from Blade Runner. Is Assange making a deliberate comparison, a shrouded clue as to his next move? While getting his cheeky new number, did he [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/resemblances/sheer-joy-as-assange-cut-loose/</link>
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		<title>Simple Jo</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Mayoress Jo Nicolls-Parker&#8217;s new haircut. This is why I read newspapers. http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/4414239/Mayoress-new-do-turns-heads]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/news/simple-jo/</link>
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		<title>The Good Fun &#8211; Naughty Little Sin</title>
		<description><![CDATA[The Good Fun, rock band and national winners of the Smokefreerockquest 2010, are too awesome. Not only does their debut single, Naughty Little Sin, rock (with welcome shades of Vampire Weekend), but they are really cool guys. I recently saw a band interview on C4 during which the songwriter read a pre-written explanation of the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.splenetical.com/uncategorized/naughty-little-sin/</link>
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