I never liked bacon anyway

According to the Bible, Cognitive Dissonance is an uncomfortable feeling caused by holding two contradictory ideas simultaneously.

I have cognitive dissonance when it comes to the Pigs, I mean the Police, I mean the Pigs…

On the one hand, I respect the Pigs immensely and demand that they risk their own lives to save mine whenever danger threatens in the slightest.

Whenever rowdy minorities drinking woodies walk past my parked car and I carefully push down the lock while clutching my mobile with white-knuckled panic.

Whenever the elderly leer aggressively at me from their bus shelter.

On the other hand, Fuck tha Police. (correctly said Poe-lease, see The Wire)

There are three reasons for Fuck tha Police.

1. They’re all corrupt, evidence-tampering half-wits.
2. A few years back I got a ticket for having dirty licence plates by a complete pig of a Pig who talked down to me like I was an infant.
3. I just got my first speeding ticket, $80 of pain.

Perhaps, for me, it should really be Fuck tha Traffic Po-lice.

Splitting hairs.